I was up until the wee hours of this morning, praying and writing and trying to figure out what the next step was for me and my spiritual journey this Lent. I was in the midst of a battle and feeling very tender of heart and spirit. When I get into these cycles of sleepless ness and worry, there is usually something deeper than my worldly concerns at the center of it. At times an unconfessed sin or a weakness needing to be brought to my husband or spiritual advisor for guidance and support to make my way to the other side.
Other times it’s just my deeeeep need for quite time with the Lord where I can pour out my heart, every last drop of fear, worry, unworthiness, contempt, sorrow, anger, frustration and pride. I cry. I write. I pray. I sing.
yep…in those darkest moments I tend to sing praise to God, in the quiet of my living room, in the middle of the night, I will sing softly and I am calm like a new born babe being rocked in it’s mothers arms. I sing.
Finally in time, I am able to leave whatever it was bothering me at the foot of the cross and sleep. So this week, since we are at the beginning of our Lenten journey i thought I would share with you some of my favorite songs that I sing in the middle of the night. The words soothe me and calm me. They are God’s lullaby to me, His daughter.
Tenth Avenue North
“Times (Over and Underneath)
Read these words:
I hear You say,
“My love is over. It’s underneath.
It’s inside. It’s in between.
The times you doubt Me, when you can’t feel.
The times that you question, ‘Is this for real? ‘
The times you’re broken.
The times that you mend.
The times that you hate Me, and the times that you bend.
Well, My love is over, it’s underneath.
It’s inside, it’s in between.
These times you’re healing, and when your heart breaks.
The times that you feel like you’re falling from grace.
The times you’re hurting.
The times that you heal.
The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
The times of confusion, in chaos and pain.
I’m there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame.
I’m there through your heartache.
I’m there in the storm.
My love I will keep you, by My pow’r alone.
I don’t care where you fall, where you have been.
I’ll never forsake you, My love never ends.
It never ends.”
Wow! His love is over and underneath me. He never leaves no matter what. God is always there surrounding me with His love and mercy.
(for all you Catholics out there, this song contains the “alleluia” which we traditionally do not sing during Lent, waiting for Easter to praise Him. Just letting you know in case You wish to hold to that tradition)
Again read a few lyrics:
The moon and stars they wept
The morning sun was dead
The Savior of the world was fallen
His body on the cross
His blood poured out for us
The weight of every curse was broken
One final breath He gave
As Heaven looked away
The Son of God was laid in darkness
A battle in the grave
The war on death was waged
The power of hell forever broken
The ground began to shake
The stone was rolled away
His perfect love could not be overcome
Now death where is your sting
Our resurrected King has rendered you defeated
Forever, He is glorified
Forever, He is lifted high
Forever, He is risen
He is alive
He is alive
He IS alive in our hearts. This season of Lent is all about how Christ overcame our sin and opened the gates of heaven just for us. He has paid the price for me and for you. There is nothing that should stand between us…ever. So in the middle of the night when my heart is heavy and weighed down, this song brings me back to the place of peace. My God is great even when I am not…ALWAYS!
This song just makes me smile.
“I will call upon your name and keep my eyes above the waves. When oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace. I am yours and you are mine”
God’s love song to all of us. Look at the cross my friends…He is yours and you are his.
This song speaks to my heart. It is the story of my life. Sometimes bad things happen to good people. God is there even when we don’t feel Him. He is there amidst every tea and every suffering, wether it be ours or that of someone we love. His healing mercy is there.
Matt Maher (with Audrey Assad)
“Lord I Need You”
Simple words, easy to memorize, which helps at 3 am when your heart is crying out to the Lord. Oh how we need him, always, every hour of every day.
“Teach my song to rise to you, when temptation comes my. When I cannot stand I will fall on you. Jesus your my hope.”
Because I am such a HUGE fan of her I will share a Lenten bonus. Audrey Assad singing “Restless” which the prayer of St. Augustine. Powerful stuff my friends.
May God be with you this day and always,